Savoring the Joy in this Journey
I am overwhelmed today by God’s kindness, gentleness, justice, and mercy. Whatever the need that I find myself experiencing, there is always an abundant and appropriate supply to satisfy it. The amount, the type, and the timing of His supply is always perfect. And it is always offered as a result of His graciousness, rather than my deservedness.
This morning I am in the midst of one of those moments when my heart, mind, and my will feel as if they have momentarily aligned perfectly in union with Him. It is as if we are making a connection in the spirit, much like eye contact between two souls who love and know one another at a very deep level. There is an interaction that takes place that does not require words. In fact, words would diminish the moment because they are inadequate to express the depth, the scope, and the beauty of the atmosphere of this spiritual intercourse. In times past, my God has revealed Himself as my loving, protective Father. He has proven Himself as a God willing to die for me in the form of the man, Jesus Christ. And then, after His death, in His absence from this earth, He has claimed me, purchased me, and placed His mark in and on me in the form of His Holy Spirit, serving as my teacher, my counselor, and the very manifest presence of Himself residing within me. But today, in this moment, as my gaze locks onto His, I am drawn into Him as the lover of my soul.
If I were able to fully and consistently, in this way, comprehend the truth of who He is, every moment of every day, I would be ruined for this earth. Perhaps not ruined, but certainly changed. Many of the things in which I currently expend my time, my life, and my energy, when viewed in the light of the presence of my savior, are revealed as vain and fruitless endeavors, even thieves of my resources, void of any lasting or eternal value, and some even serving as an enemy of my soul. Oh that I might learn the difference between that which will enhance my life and my effectiveness on this planet as well as my rewards in eternity and that which is a distraction intended to keep me from the fullness of my relationship with the Father and all that He has designed for me to be and to do.
But as and until that process of learning and maturity takes place I can only savor the baptism of His grace. There is such a satiation of satisfaction in knowing the perfect love of God. Perfect love casts out all fear. I need not fear an inappropriate response from God. I need not fear His rejection or scorn. I need never fear that His love is fickle, conditional, or shallow. I can have complete trust that his discipline will serve to bring me closer to Him, it will not be used to destroy or debase me. I am His dearly beloved child. There is no better thing than to be a daughter of the Almighty, to hear His voice as He speaks through His word, to literally know Him by the presence of His Holy Spirit speaking to my spirit. As deep calls to deep within me, I find myself enamored and falling in love with my Lord yet again, even deeper than the time or times before. He truly is my first love.
As my spirit makes eye contact with His, I am enveloped in a beauty that wafts around me like the scent of a favored fragrance. I am disarmed and vulnerable, speechless, the words of my vocabulary having been stripped down to those of this simple song…
In moments like these, I sing out a song, I sing out a love song to Jesus.
Singing, I love you Lord,
Singing I love you, Lord,
Singing I love you, Lord,
I… I love you, Lord.
Kelly Finke – April 2012